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Tiny Thoughts: Scar Tissue in Relationships

Tiny Thoughts: Scar Tissue in Relationships
Photo by Afif Ramdhasuma / Unsplash

Scar Tissues Make Relationships Wear Out

  • I came across someone sharing this excerpt from a lecture at Stanford and it really resonated with me.
  • Relationships don’t end in one dramatic incident, it’s very often a lot of little things that people in the relationship never fully got over that caused it to end.  This lingering pain or annoyance from small things builds up “scar tissue” in the relationship.
  • If you ever hear the phrase "You always X", that’s an example of scar tissue that has built up in your relationship.
  • John Oustershout, the Professor who gave this lecture, suggests that we do our best to pay attention to this scar tissue and try to prevent it from being created.  It’s a difficult task but do your best to resolve conflicts in the relationships you care about with no animosity.  Try to make sure both parties are fully “over it” before moving on.